Christmas can be a delightful time of the year especially for families with children.
However, for parents with children who are separated, it can be incredibly emotive trying to agree who the children shall spend Christmas with.
This is perhaps more complex than ever this year where the ongoing pandemic and resulting lockdowns are putting increasing pressure on family dynamics. In addition, there are complications with self-isolation periods and having to assess the risks of the children coming into contact with vulnerable members of the family, all of which can impact on one parent’s ability or willingness to agree to certain arrangements.
In each of the lockdowns, children have been allowed to move between separated parents so long as none of the parties were self-isolating meaning that whether households are allowed to mix or not, children will be able to travel between their parents to celebrate with them.
Unless there is already a court order in place which sets out the time and frequency which the children will spend with each of you over Christmas and the new year, now is the time to try and agree these matters with your ex-partner as doing so will reduce the stress of a traditionally chaotic season.
It is only natural that you will want to spend time and celebrate with your children, but your decisions over where and when they celebrate should consider their needs first. If they are old enough, have a conversation with them about the plans that you are putting in place and if you have teenagers ask them what they would like to do.
If you are the parent with the primary care of the children, put yourself in the position of your ex- partner and ask yourself if you would be happy with the arrangements you are putting forward. Whilst relationship breakups can cause animosity and acrimony, try to be fair for the sake of the children.
Remember also that there needs to be room for flexibility. This year, like no other, we have all had to make an accept changes at short notice so if someone suddenly has to isolate or change plans because of something that has happened beyond their control, try to work through the situation with your ex-partner.
If communications between you and your ex-partner are difficult and you feel you may need a family law solicitor to advise on or negotiate an agreement then please contact Allen Bailey at the Catterick Garrison office on 01748 832431 or email enquiries@scottswright.com